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Hey everyone. It's about that time again. So pull up a chair and sit down, and now that were already for this adventure as it were. On Tuesday, my mom told me that we were going to have a family meeting at the narrow search and the next day at the hospital where my grandmother is being taken care of she thought that it would be good if I would've come to visit with my grandmother and basically have a date where it could be close to my family. All of her grandchildren were invited, minus my cousin Matthew because he's only 10 his parents don't think it would be appropriate at this point to see my grandmother, because it may frighten him and he may not fully understand what's going on. Which I completely agree with. And when we got there we went right up to see my grandmother. Now I described in my grandmother and how she looked the last time I saw her, which was at the end of March. She looked hundred times better than he did the last time I saw her. It's true that she had more things helping her But all in all, I think she's getting better she actually reached for my hand twice while I went in and around and sat next to her. I was holding one of her hands, but that didn't seem to respond to my touch, but her right hand definitely reached for me twice so I think she recognized my voice even though she'd never looked at me. Then shortly after I went downstairs to talk to my uncle and my aunt, my brothers fiancé actually skipped to important meetings that day just to hear what the doctor had to say, which I thought was extremely nice. Shortly after all that it was quiet time in the ward where my grandmother was from two to 4 p.m. all patients are not allowed to have visitors so for two hours. I will blood-pressure basically sat with my relatives and talked and reminisced about our favorite memories with my grandmother but still, it felt like time virtually stopped for a while. I have no bloke and no computer, which drove me nuts earlier in the day my uncle had said that that the neurosurgeon would meet with us at four o'clock 14 o'clock came around. She still wasn't there so we have to wait for almost another hour before he called us in to the meeting we met in a small conference room that had a small table. I don't think he was prepared for all these people to be in this little room my cousin Mary Jane was unable to make it because she had work. So that was the only person that could have been there and was invited to be there after the introductions were made, he stated that he was amazed that my grandmother has been doing so well with all the sickness that she has and that many people probably would have passed away by now. He said that she came into the hospital with certain symptoms which my aunt vehemently disputed after the meeting of course. She came in with dehydration and low blood pressure. He also said that when she first came in they did a CAT scan and an MRI to my grandmother's brain and its they had originally seen what they thought was a stroke. But they weren't sure. That's what it looked like when she first came in the hospital. Then a couple weeks ago I would say about two weeks. They did the CAT scan in MRI and he said. It didn't look like she had a stroke he said that a stroke after it happens. After a certain number of weeks, the CAT scan is supposed to show a change that's typical for stroke victims. However, he didn't see that in my grandmother's case he thinks it's a tumor. He suggested that she goes in for a biopsy so that we would know in definitely what it was one way or the other he says that the biopsy should be performed in about 10 days afterword. Other options said he suggested making her more comfortable and in a couple weeks and then see if there was any change, because he said that there was an increase of swelling in that area. So we opted for the biopsy procedure and a couple days ago. My grandmother's cardiologist said that that would not be the best thing for her because she's weak and her heart may not be able to take the surgery so you suggested that we just put her on steroids. And if the tumor get smaller, we know it's benign and if it doesn't change or gets bigger. We know it's malignant. So my uncle has to talk to the doctor s'more and figure out what's going on, and she keeps her eyes open more and she seems to be watching TV in her room, but I'm not so sure because. Sometimes she responds to a person and sometimes she doesn't. She may know, you she may not, we don't know, what we do know that she does seem to respond to the German language, because her niece called my uncle and she put this cell phone next to my grandmother's ear and she seemed to understand what was going on, her eyes got extremely big if there was a reaction to her body started moving and she seemed to understand she didn't say anything, but you could definitely tell that something was going on there because her eyes got really wide and she was trying to concentrate and send it looked like she was trying to comprehend what was being said. When my uncle took this cell phone away. My grandmother kind of gave him a what are you doing put that back look on her face so that was very encouraging. So were going to try to bring German tapes into her room for a to listen to and help her in whatever way we can. After the meeting with the neurosurgeon I broke down into tears it was a fairly positive or neutral meeting I was just emotionally spent. And I thought about all the times that I could've went to see my grandmother and I chose not to.
10 1/2 years ago my father died after having a heart attack while he was driving shortly before the accident. I was not the best daughter in the world I often complained of my grandmother that I didn't know why he needed to go see my dad I hated going with him and I just wanted to stay with her instead of go with him. That was replaying in my mind as I was leaving the room. And that's what made me cry. I honestly thought that it was going to repeat itself and my mom reassured me that my dad knew that I loved him and she's sure that my grandmother knows that I love her as well. Whenever I would go into her hospital room. I always say that I got up early, use it just to come and see your because ever since I was younger I wouldn't get up early for anyone, much less my grandmother. Even though I loved her so much so. I talked to my uncle yesterday, and nothing new has really come about, the doctors don't usually work on the weekends so at the end of the day it on the weekdays. I talked to my uncle on asked how my grandmother's doing and she's doing good. She goes in and out of knowing who you are and not knowing. She doesn't talk, but she opens her eyes and she looks around and she recognizes people. Sometimes aware not to her when she does, and when she doesn't
so that's where we are right now if there's any change I will let you all know.
School is going okay. I'm still a little bit behind on some things but everything that I hand in comes back as an A fish is doing the work to turn it in is becoming increasingly hard. But I'm doing the best that I can and my teacher knows everything that's going on almost every day I cry about something relating to my grandmother. And I'm just so afraid of what's going to happen. I bought a new prayer book that I hope will make me feel better because I do have found that of dwelling on things that I can't change I like to call it spinning my wheels hygienist get myself in a rut and I can get out that's when my whole life goes out of control. I know I shouldn't let myself do this, but sometuasimes it's very hard for me to control it but I'm trying because there's only two weeks left in class and now needs to get everything turned in on doing the best that I can
Until next time
Lady Lisa
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